|
Membership Renewal Moments
Reflections by:
As most of you know, January and February are our months for membership renewal at UUCPA. As part of that process this year, members of the congregation have been speaking in each service to share their dreams for UUCPA. We have received a number of requests to make those "membership renewal moments" available in written form.
2/10 Corinne Bilz
2/17 Elizabeth Berry
Corinne Bilz
February 10: Corinne Bilz
Words from the Heart
I must tell you: I come from a church background, and I'm cynical. I joined a church in Virginia Beach, Virginia, where I lived for 13 years and for several years sang solos, gave the children's sermon, and actively participated in the church. They told me they were a "liberal" church and even had a gay man there once.
Still, there was something different about that UCC church and this church. There was a part of me- a part of my life- that felt invisible. I'm not saying I wasn't accepted by most of the parishioners who knew I was a lesbian. I'm not even saying many of them weren't for the ordination of gays and lesbians-in theory. There was this one gentleman in my religious education class, a psychiatrist, who said to me, "There are teachers who are gay and lesbian who teach and corrupt our children. Don't you think so?" Of course, because I was afraid to speak up, to be "found out", and perhaps, lose my job...I agreed with him. And then, after being involved with that church for several years, I decided to change my career path and pursue the ministry. Having been accepted at the Pacific School of Religion in Berkeley, I asked my church to endorse my decision to enroll. The Board of Deacons were people I had known and trusted from the beginning...friends who had known my "secret" all along. The minister pulled out the Bible and told me they had discussed the issue and decided I was a sinner and lived a sinful lifestyle. This was a "liberal" church in Virginia.
I can't express to you the embarrassment shame and betrayal I felt. I can tell you something died inside of me, although my faith remained intact. And I learned to be extremely skeptical of organized religion. I decided I would never step foot in another church as a member again. Then I met Marnie. Marnie was a lesbian woman who, before coming out, had been married to a man for 24 years to the former minister of this church. They divorced about nine years ago; she came out as a lesbian, and she still loved her church, and you all loved her. This church appears to me to be a church of not only tolerance but affirmation. God knows I don't need tolerance. I can get that on a street corner.
And that is what I would like this church to be, a church that affirms gays and lesbians. Let me tell you something. If you want us in your church, we'll need more than tolerance. Remember; I'm still cynical. But here's what I've found so far: Members who have welcomed me right away...as a lesbian and a person of dignity and worth...Hannah, Cilla, Kathy,Jenise, Marilyn, Sue, Nancy, Susan, Fran... names too many to say. I met JimDelaHunt at the San Jose Gay Pride March...with a huge female puppet wearingawedding dress over his head; and lo and behold, he was here, too. And when I introduced my mother to the congregation, he said, "Hi, Mom!" We gay and lesbian people need people like Jim to believe and fight for us. Barb and Stacy, long term partners who have raised a family together... we need people like you, too. Two women partners who shared in this church last week, and one actually said, "I am a lesbian". We need them, too. Fathers and mothers who have celebrated their gay children in this community; others who truly support us. What a gift you all are to someone like me. You are helping me learn to love and celebrate myself, my life, my partner. Kurt and Darcey, two ministers who affirmed Marnie and me when we shared about our family - as new as we were. We need you, too.
I don't know. I'm still skeptical. I still can't believe you'd welcome and affirm me. What is it about the dignity and worth of every human being? I did not want to be a part of another church...ever. And there 's a part of me that still doesn't...that's still skeptical. But I like what I have found here. I'm still watching...but I like what I see.
There are a lot of people like me who will never find a community like this. I'm just grateful I have. In the name of a God that is love, you love. In the name of a God that is love, you include us in your worship. In the name of a God that is love, you do not and will not expel us from loving family relationships. In the name of a God that is love, you insist our commitments mean so very much. In the name of a God that is love, you demand that we be allowed to legally marry. In the name of a God that is love, you accept and ask of us the multitude of gifts of creativity we have freely given the world in so many areas.
I thank you.
Maribea and Elizabeth Berry
February 17: Maribea and Elizabeth Berry
My first visit to this church happened on Easter Sunday, 1999. The big rainbow flag flying out front every Sunday was invitation enough for me to explore this congregation and its values. On that first visit, as I pensively located four seats in a crowded Main Hall, I was pleasantly surprised to see familiar faces - parents of my daughter's schoolmates.
After that first visit, Tim and I made the decision to join this church. It just felt right. In my opinion, that is the essence of this church. It just feels right. The words spoken here on Sunday mornings allow me to cry when I need to, and allow me to recognize and appreciate the openness with which others share their experiences in front of the entire congregation. My definition of a "welcoming congregation" is a church where there is no fear in sharing life's events with the congregation. That is a truly dramatic departure and a refreshing change from my religious experience in the past.
I want this church to continue to be a welcoming congregation to families - especially for parents who want to provide a spiritual environment for their children. This church is somewhat unique in that it provides an openness in spirituality that allows parents of varying religious backgrounds to share their experiences with their children, without rigid structure around religious practices. I am grateful that my children learn about all religions at this church, and that they are taught the inherent worth and dignity of each person - including themselves. My dream for this church is to continue to teach its principles to younger generations - the church of the open mind, helping hand, and loving heart.
Elizabeth Berry
Elizabeth has prepared some thoughts on what her favorite church would be
like.
On Monday, there would be BINGO with snacks for players.
On Tuesday, there would be Families In Church.
On Wednesday, parents would be out of church (do anything they want to) and
the kids would attend classes at church.
On Thursday, there would be a party at church, like a Round Robin Dinner or
a movie night for kids.
On Friday, there would be a bouncer at church.
And on Saturday and Sunday, no church because kids will have play dates and
parents have chores to do.
|